The nation's pigs request that you please refer to that nasty cough as "H1N1," not "swine flu." You're hurting their feelings, plus canned ham sales are down.
On a related note, please start calling salt "NaCl."
Do you know someone or something that needs an honorable discharge from popular culture? Let us know. If we use your suggestion, we'll send you an exclusive YAFTG executive stress ball. Fun at parties!
YOU ARE FREE TO GO
"You Are Free To Go" addresses people, places, songs, sayings and anything else with a tenuous contribution to our culture that is no longer necessary. Thanks, trucker hats, Melissa Rivers, and obsessive use of hand sanitizer -- You Are Free To Go. By contributing writers for The Onion.
UPDATED MONDAY THROUGH FRIDAY --Which is more than fair.
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