I'll Have What She's Having

Picky eaters don't bother us generally -- what they choose to put in (or not put in) their mouths is their business.

It's the restaurant ordering ritual that takes the entire group down, since "what's on the menu" rarely satisfies. Leave off this. Add that. Can I get this on the side? Can I substitute?

Would it kill you to just order the #3?

Buffet the Appetite Slayer

Things we don't love about the buffet:

* The indeterminate period between food preparation and our arrival at said foodstuff

* The weird junior high chemistry lab burners keeping the food warm

* The swarthy fellow out on work release carving the roast beef

* The six-year-old just ahead of us sticking his elbow into everything

* Serving utensils touched by everyone in the room -- and where was the last place besides a buffet you actually saw tongs?

Foodie Fight

We've got nothing against eating, and we'll even cook if we have to.

But the term "foodie" sticks in our craw like bad bratwurst -- has there ever been a dumber sounding name for something this pretentious?

Don't even bring up the subject of wine tasting parties.