Middle school band concert or geese murder? You decide.
We're all for young people learning to play music -- less time for them to feed their video game and online pornography habits.
Wouldn't it be better for all involved, however, if Professor I Could Have Been A Professional Sousaphone Player held off on the public concerts until the kids got a little better?
Public humiliation is no way to start a musical career.
Do you know someone or something that needs an honorable discharge from popular culture? Let us know. If we use your suggestion, we'll send you an exclusive YAFTG executive stress ball. Fun at parties!
YOU ARE FREE TO GO
"You Are Free To Go" addresses people, places, songs, sayings and anything else with a tenuous contribution to our culture that is no longer necessary. Thanks, trucker hats, Melissa Rivers, and obsessive use of hand sanitizer -- You Are Free To Go. By contributing writers for The Onion.
UPDATED MONDAY THROUGH FRIDAY --Which is more than fair.
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